Happy Birthday to Me

Birthday photo I made B take: see my new dress!

Yesterday was my birthday (I am now 34, which seems soooo old I must say. B and I decided to promptly forget how old we were in favor of vagueness.)

Before baby, I was obsessed with my birthday. They are a really big deal in my family (my mom has been known to celebrate her birthday for up to two weeks); when I was a kid, my parents would decorate the whole house, buy me a mini-toystore, make three special meals (forget just one!), etc. At least one of them would take the day off work to spend it catering to my desires.

It was always a day dedicated to doing exactly what I wanted, which since adulthood has meant homemade breakfast (by B), lunch and dinner out somewhere nice (with B), and the rest of the day visiting either museums or historical sites (accompanied by B). Obviously my birthday means a lot of work for B, but he has always obliged me by taking the day off work and spending it on spoiling me instead (he is a nice husband).

This year I actually forgot it was my birthday until the afternoon before. I did remember eventually (mostly only because it was my mom's birthday, which is the day before mine), but somehow I just wasn't that into it. In the end I did have a good time. B got up early with R and made us breakfast, we went out to lunch and then visited a museum (Ukrainian gold exhibit at the National Museum, quite interesting). Then B took R swimming while I read. Later B and I went out to dinner (Peranakan food at Blue Ginger, very good though I think Guan Hoe Soon is better) and drinks (at PS Cafe). 

What most of the other pictures look like: it's all about R

I wrote before about being parent-centered. I still think this, but it's impossible to be parent centered much of the time when you have a willful toddler. I can make her go to the museum, but then B has to spend most of our visit supervising her to prevent her from yelling, running, climbing on exhibits, or touching things she shouldn't (she is pretty well behaved but unfortunately has to learn all society's rules from scratch). We can go out to eat, but then a portion of my attention has to constantly be on R, to make sure she is following all the rules (sitting politely in the chair, being quiet, not making a mess: she can do this but forgets easily) and has what she needs. Though I am deciding on the path we go on, R can't follow me without my constant help, so anything we do means a lot of R-focused activity.

Thus having a very self-indulgent birthday in celebration of ME ME ME! just can't happen. Maybe that's why I'm not that excited about my birthday lately. Someday I know R will grow bigger, and then I can conscript her into my birthday plans (as my mom does with me). Until then, I guess it's a good opportunity to practice being less greedy.